I also didn't proof read. So just deal with it.

Hello it is I! 

I'm never disappointed by Google. It's a Halloween bagel. 

  Okay so.... this week has been terrible. Not the worst week I've had in my life, I can definitely think of times that have been worse, but this week was pretty bad. It started out fine. Sunday was awesome. Jonathan came over and Mercy, him, and I went to go see the Maze Runner together and then we went to youth group, and it was the best youth group of the year. The Senior class had too much fun getting into trouble, snapchatting each other, and sneaking off to "Starbucks". And then Monday was alright for most of the day but something happened and suddenly every emotion I've ever had was spiraling out of control. 

  You know those times when all you want is to be alone? That feeling of not wanting to be with people, especially those you live with, and you just want it to be quiet. But then as soon as you get alone, you realize it was the worst decision you could possibly have made. And every thought in your head is horrible, and all you need to do is cry.

  That was my whole week. And yes girls, I did cry. I absolutely hate taking showers because then I'm stuck with wet hair for the next 5 hours (#firstworldproblems), but there was a point where I actually took a shower just so I could spend 15 minutes sobbing because I couldn't hold it in anymore. 

  And part of me knows that it's just me being a girl and we girls just have those... times... of total emotional interrupt, but another part of me is utterly confused, lost, and still upset. 

  But I've been finding ways of distracting myself from the thoughts in my head and somehow, I'm not sure how, I've been surviving this week. 

  So for a change of topic. I'M SO EXCITED FOR HALLOWEEN AND NOVEMBER AND WRITING STORIES WITH YOU AND WRITING A STORY BY MYSELF FOR NANOWRIMO (WHICH MIGHT HAVE A SCHIZOPHRENIC PERSON IN IT BECAUSE I'M FASCINATED BY THAT AND OTHER MIND PROBLEMS.) 

  I'm so happy that all of you gurls like my pirate idea, just please don't feel like it has to just be pirates. I don't care if only one of the characters is a pirate. or even if the only mention of a swashbuckling scalawag is that one person wears a pirate hat and has a crush on Will Turner (ew). It doesn't matter and I don't know why I'm worrying about this. You gurls will make it special and original and unique much better than if just one of us were to write something. 

  Another thing, I had someone at work today tell me that Halloween is a demonic holiday and it doesn't make sense that a Christian would celebrate it. That was an interesting conversation. But everyone is entitled to their own opinion. But I certainly don't know if 'celebrate' is a good word for how I approach Halloween. Maybe I celebrate the chocolate. And get excited about the costumes. I don't know. What are your thoughts about it? Fandom, let me know in the comments 

  This week I'm thankful that I didn't end up killing myself or anyone else while I've been riding the wave of terror called emotions. 

  But I have to go to a driving class, so I guess I'll say my farewells and I can't wait for next week when The Round Story 2.0 will start <3 G

I'm not quite sure what I just wrote, but I don't want to proof read.

Well, it's hump day!

Actually, it's Tuesday night. I'm currently watching the World Series. Kansas City is beating the crap out of San Francisco, but I'm sure you don't care. I'm not here to talk about baseball, I'm here to fangirl about Halloween, however I shall reply to your posts first.

Grace: The pirate round story idea is genius. And, while we are making suggestions, I think the characters from last years (holy snot that was a year ago?) round story should come in...just saying...

Laura: So you're freaking coming home on freaking Halloween which freaking screws my freaking Cracker Barrel plan and I freaking hate you. But whatever. It's good to hear you're enjoying school.

Mercy: Your post was short and sweet. Like my grade school crush. He was really short. He's still really short. But that's irrelevant.

Well gurls, as I said before, this post is a Halloween appreciation post. This year, this October, I've gotten into the Halloween spirit. If there is a Halloween spirit? Other than the obvious...

Friday night, I sat alone in my room in the dark watching Psycho, which was not really that scary.

Except for this part. And the shower scene was a little creepy

But as I was watching Psycho, I decided I like being scared. There's something so glorious about having the crap scared out of you, you know?  My point is, old horror movies are the best man created thing ever, and the next we're all together, I'm making all of you watch Psycho and possibly The Shining.

Anyway, Halloween.

Halloween is the best of all holidays.

Reasons Why Halloween Is The Best Holiday, Don't Argue Because You're Wrong

• Candy, obviously.
• You get to dress up like a character from a book and not get teased for it. 
• Carving pumpkins.
• Horror movies.
• The Halloween feasts in Harry Potter were always the best part. 
• Did I mention candy?
• The seasonal, pumpkin shaped Reeses. They have more peanut butter! 

I can honestly confess, that I'm anxiously awaiting Friday. 

Originally my Halloween plans were going to Cracker Barrel with Ben, however those plans were thwarted by Laura's "coming home for Halloween" and "trick or treating with friends" plan.  So now my plans for Halloween are sitting alone in bedroom, in the dark, watching the Shining and eating candy. Well, and dressing up. This year, because of my fabulous new haircut, I'm going to part my hair down the middle and be Matt Damon from Good Will Hunting. While on the subject of costumes, gurls, Dear Reader Chums, are you dressing up? If so, what are you dressing up as?

Well, I have some Stephen to King, fare thee well.

Rice, I'm looking forward to your post tomorrow.

Gurl please. -Rose

The shortest post of all time #noregrets.

Good evening gurls, it's Tuesday.

I'm using Halloween gif's today since the holiday is right around the corner.

So, I'm like really tired today and I don't remember what I was gonna talk about (Although I did have something) so I guess I should just reply to your posts...

LauraPoo- I'm so glad you're feeling better :) it makes me upset when my friends are upset, so I'm really happy that you're doing better. Literally, lists are like my favorite things in the world, and my favorite kind are list of thing that make you happy, like AHH I love them!!

Rosie- your post was um....

Gracie-


I LOVE THE PIRATE IDEA SO MUCH!!!! AHHHH

wow so I'm listening to this EP on Spotify and it's really, really good... it was just this girl I found on Youtube and she mentioned having an EP on Spotify so I was like 'oh I'll just add it' and OHADFKJHASJKFGALKHEGDFDHSFKJH it's so good.

Her name is Drew Tabor and my favorite song that I've heard by her so far is this one..

That's a really old video, she's a lot older now, but that song is on her EP and it's beautiful.

ANYWAY I gotta go cuz my computer time is abouta log me out, so just... Yeah. 

Rosie, I'll see you tomorrow. 

xoxo,

Mercy.

The Art of Thinking (Positively)

Hey y'all.

Today was actually a happy Monday :)

    I love ending my usually hectic Mondays by writing a letter to my three favorite people. Most days, posting cheers me up from an exhausting day at school and makes me fall asleep sooner with a smile on my face. Today, however, was an unusually fantastic day, and I'm grinning even now, as I sit squirreled away in a corner of the library, trying to get this published before midnight as well as complete my massive pile of homework.
     But enough about me and my peppy state of emotions. Time to reply to last week's posts:
     Merrrrrrcy: I get the aggravation you have at people who don't understand religion, or judge you for your personal relationship with Jesus. If it makes you feel any better, kids are only like that in high school because they want so desperately to have something, anything to stand for, and they think it makes them look cool to have no respect for other people's beliefs (seriously, the only differences between high school and middle school are STDs and driver's licenses). So, keep calm and Jesus on, honey. It gets better eventually, kids outgrow their pigheadedness and develop tolerance.

    Rosieeeee- you visited me yesterday and met some of my friends and it was actually lovely to have three-fourths of our family on campus.
    And what the Sam heck was your post even about?

Sam heck- get it? Monday is punday

    Graaaaaace- I just love you. You're so resilient and insightful and wise. I can't wait to see what happens when you happen to the world.
    And I can't wait to start the pirate round story next week!

    So, I've been trying think positively this past week and it's literally changing my world. Earlier last week I was not in a good place and I hated everything and I didn't want to be me. And I realized that since I came to school I've just become a very ungrateful person who has lost sight of what God blessed me with. And so I decided to try thinking happy thoughts, and you know what? It's really working.
Things Laura Has To Be Thankful For:
1. A wonderful family and a very understanding, accepting mother
2. An incredible opportunity to go to one of the best colleges in the country 
3. Only one B on my report card :)
4. An amazing, weird, hilarious, supportive, diverse group of friends here at SHU, ranging from nursing majors to choir nerds to theater kids to Jesus freaks
5. Coffee.
6. A warm bed to crawl into after a long day of colleging
7. Love and encouragement from people back home
8. Warm clothes and cute knitted things to wear around campus as fall settles in
9. The beautiful New England foliage, sights and sounds of autumn
10. The grace of a wonderful God, who catches me when I fall and loves me best in my ugliest moments
    This weekend was Family Weekend at SHU. I went from a fantastic choir dress rehearsal to home on Saturday, and I had a ball just hanging out with my family and got to eat Mom's food and take a shower in my very own bathroom. On Sunday I sang in Mass and then The Roommate and I got ready for our choir concert, and I felt so elegant in my dress and all the girls looked beautiful and the guys looked so handsome (something about a guy in a tux...it makes even the biggest geeks look dashing). We sang our hearts out and laughed and had a great time, and I don't know why I was so nervous beforehand. And today I got a great night's sleep and drank coffee and had a nice conversation with the Scum of Trumbull (my large firefighter friend) and he gave me guy advice and thoroughly distracted me from any studying whatsoever. I laid out in the sun with Rachel and laughed through choir practice and ate dinner with some of my favorite people and went to theater and laughed some more. And for the first time in awhile I felt truly alive.
    I haven't been doing fine on my own. I've been broken, anxious, bleak, drained. I've been getting help, and by the grace of God I am waking up again, seizing the day and making the most of where He has me. Sometimes I scare myself. But by simply thinking happy thoughts I have been able to draw out of myself and live. And it has been truly wonderful.
    It's a beautiful world out there, girls. We only have to stop and look out for it.
It's 11;42 and I have a paper to write. So, I must away. Mercy, I anticipate hearing from you tomorrow.
--Laura :)

I just have a thing for pirates

Hi girlies 

I hope all of you are well. I feel like I've been extremely tired, and almost like something's been missing from my life for a couple weeks.... but I don't want to dwell on those thoughts. I should face them eventually but if I haven't yet, than do I ever have to? 

That's the thing I've realized about myself, I'm pretty emotional and not only do I seriously dislike that, but I also try and ignore it. And it works pretty well, for the most part, until I end up feeling things that I don't know how to deal with. And I seriously don't know how people deal with me, because I can't even deal with myself. I think that's why i spend so much time sleeping, reading, YouTubing etc. I don't want to deal with anything and it's a terrible way of living and that's why I don't know how my family deals with me. Hopefully I won't ever have to start my own family and make them have to deal with me. Unless I get over myself at some point and learn to live. 

ANYWAY. Moving on because I don't want to think about that anymore. 

I think our NaShoStoWriMo story should have a pirate element. Why? Because pirates are FREAKING AWESOME, that's why. 

1) They live on pirate ships 

2) they have cool clothes

3) They talk to mermaids

4) they travel all over the world 

5) they have awesome accents

6) They shoot guns

7) they sword fight 

8) Jack Sparrow is a pretty cool guy

9) facial hair

10) they're known as ruthless killers, but underneath, they're like big TEDDY bears (see what I did there?!? I referenced last years story, incase you couldn't tell) 

Also, bonus fact, we're going to Mystic Seaport this weekend and I'm really excited to hopefully see some pirates. 

But anyway, I have other things to do LIKE GO READ THE NEW WORLD WAR 2 NOVEL I GOT THAT ROSE NEEDS TO READ. It's called Rose Under Fire and it's by Elizabeth Wein and it is about an American pilot who gets captured by Nazis and sent to a concentration camp and it's just so fantastic. One of the best books I've read in awhile. I'm only about half way in but hopefully the end will be as good as the beginning. 

<3 G

Ps- from now until Thanksgiving, I'm going to make a list of things I'm thankful for starting today. 

Today I'm thankful for my job. Even though I do complain about it, I am extremely thankful that I work in a safe, fun, rewarding environment with some very nice people. And with some extremely tasty food. And some nice paychecks 

So, uhm but yeah.

It's hump day!

I almost forgot to post again....I suppose it's because mind's been in a muddle lately. More on that later, for I am going to reply to you lovely ladies posts.

Grace: I felt very punished after gazing through the Shanko/Bean pictures in your post. I shudder to think of it.

Laura: I can't believe we forgot the 200th post. Actually, I can believe I forgot it, and Mercy too, but the fact that you and Grace forgot it, well, it's hard to believe. When I was reading your post, just now naturally, because it's me, I got all sentimental a fuzzy on the inside. I love out little third space. I also love coffee, so I'm going to go get some.

Mercy: Your post was great. It made me miss your stupid face. Remind me again why we don't live closer?

I write this to you as I am wrapped up burrito style in my quilt at the computer desk, having just watched the Great Gatsby (Which was terrible by the way). As I mentioned before, my mind is all in a muddle. I'm not really sure why, but I've keep on not being able to talk. Like, I'll be in the middle of a conversation with someone and I just can't think of anything to say. And when I can think of something to say it's completely irrelevant. I don't really know how to explain it. I can't focus on anything. Like just now, I wrote this entire paragraph, and I have no idea where I was going with this. Ah, well. 

On a completely unrelated note, I'm currently in the middle of reading A Song of Myself, by Walt Whitman, and it's wonderful. I've decided that my literature taste needs to branch out towards poetry and short stories, because that's all my attention span can handle these days. 

Also, as Laura mentioned in her post, it's nearly November. So Round Story 2.0? I think yes. 

Uhm, so yeah I'm gonna go. Grace, I'm looking forward to your post tomorrow, I hope there won't be any Bean in it.

Gurl please. -Rose

Whet

I JUST WROTE LIKE HALF A POST AND THEN IT DELETED ITSELF I AM VERY MAD UAJDNCKSMQLSBEKABDJQJDNLDKDJRODJ

Anyway. 

Good evening gurls, it's Tuesday. 

Our computer is still broken so I'm using Gracie's phone again, yay. 

Speaking of the little burrito child, her post was... Well it was... 

That sums it up. I'm not gonna talk about  it. Ever. 

Laura, your post was beautiful, sentimental and wise, causing me to reminisce on our younger days. Can I just say- Week Three??

..... 

Ahh, what adorable children we were. 

So anyway, today's been a good day. School went well except my bus ride home took like 8123456790000000000000 hours and that was annoying cuz I just wanted to be home and stuff, but Abbie's boyfriend came over this evening and we made spring rolls with yummy sauce and I LOVE Asian food so I really appriciated that, and now we're watching The Princess Bride because Anton has never seen it. (I know, right?? What kind of life is he living?) 

Sooo I honestly can't stand what some people think of religion- like they think that just because they're not religious that means that they can just make stupid and offensive jokes and not even think about the people around them like UM GURL YOU LIKE HAVING YOUR VIEWS AND OPNIONS RESPECTED, SO WHY CAN'T YOU KEEP IN MIND THAT OTHER PEOPLE ARE GONNA WANT THEIRS RESPECTED TOO like seriously why you gotta be so roooood. 

^^ best response to anything just.... Whet??? *hand gesture included*

Anyway I'm just fed up with the ignorant children at my school who don't know anything but won't bothering to listen when someone tries to explain like CHILD. STOP. YOU LOOK LIKE AN IDIOT. A RUDE IDIOT.

Goodness.. I haven't had a good rant in a while. 

Anyway I gotta go. I'm glad we had this talk. 

Rosie, I'll HOPEFULLY, and BETTER hear from you tomorrow... Or else.

xoxo, 

Mercy. 

Great and terrible things.

Hey girlies!

how I conquered today

    This is Laura- just Laura. Only I am posting today. Which is weird, considering THIS IS OUR 200TH POST ON OUR THOUGHTS ARE STARS!!!!!!!!!!!

   How in the Sam heck did we miss that one, guys? I logged onto Blogger, went to hit the 'New Post' option, scrolling down like "doodoodoo, however many page views, however many followers, 199 posts- 199 POSTS SWEET MOTHER OF OUR DEAR AND MERCIFUL LORD JESUS CHRIST (clearly I've been at a Catholic school for too long) WE FORGOT SHOULD WE CELEBRATE IDK HERE COME SOME RANDOM GIFS AND WHATNOT TO CELEBRATE THIS MILESTONE"

    You get the picture. I can't believe we've had this blog for almost thirteen months. We can backtrack even further than that- I can't believe we've been friends for our entire lives. I am the only one who has lived without you girls, but I cannot remember not knowing you. I remember seeing Rosie's flailing infant legs right after she was born, I remember when Mercy's white-blonde, q-tip head barely reached my shoulder, I remember Gracie in turtlenecks and jean jumpers. Time has passed indeed, and it's funny how you have all changed, yet stayed the exact same all at once. Rosie still kicks violently when she doesn't want to socialize. Mercy's hair is as flyaway and fabulous as ever. Gracie has for the most part stopped dressing like she's homeless, but every now and again she has one of those days.
    We're all moving up in the world. Our Foursome has been split into three corners of the earth- Rosie stays holed up in our warm, hospitable, mad home. Grace and Mercy remain in their little corner of the State. I do most of my living between my dorm and the main academic building here at Sacred Heart. Things are happening to us, ladies- great and terrible things, things that have made me cry and bite my pillow and bang my head into the wall on occasion. And yet, these things, although terrifying and maddening and awkward, must happen. Rosie has to eventually leave the house. Mercy has to keep calm and drama on (in reference to school). Gracie has to power through senioritis. I have to graduate nursing school. We all have things to do -great, terrible things- and that's okay. People hate change, but it is always necessary in order for us to move along on the journey God has planned for us- the journey of life, of true love and heartbreak and temptation and loneliness and music and laughter. It's a crazy whirlwind of unpredictability, but in the end I believe it will all be worth it.
    I'm glad we have this blog. I'm glad because in the face of all this change, we have each other and this letter-writing project to cling to with consistency when all else is uncertain. We may change, our writing styles may change, but OTAS will be here, and for that I am unspeakably grateful.
    Ladies, here's to a happy 200 and an even happier next 100. Mercy, I'll see you tomorrow.
--Laura :)
(ALSO- NaShoStoWriMo again this November? Let me know what you all think!)

I guess I have to do this

Dear people of the interweb,

It is my, Grace Ege's, destiny to punish Rose today. I feel the power tingling at the edge of my fingertips, my blood is pumping and my energy is up.... but I'm not exactly sure what I'm supposed to be doing. Yeah I know that it's like "mock them heartlessly in pretending to be them" or something like that, but I'm still a bit confused. I feel like I'm throwing away a really good opportunity by skipping out on punishing Rose, but I honestly don't really want to very much. I'm overly tired and I'm not on the computer which greatly takes away the power I could have. So instead of trying to use my brain to do something, Google will work better. 

Rose, this is for your. 

Gurls, I feel like I haven't written a legit post on this blog in awhile. I haven't sat down and thought something through in a long time. The past couple weeks on here have been down to the last couple hours and I haven't said anything of significance.... and that makes me sad because this is my favorite blog with my favorite people. So hopefully this week I can get my life back together and maybe next week I'll give you something of value. But just know that for now I love you all and wish I could write something good for you to read and keep you entertained on this cold and rainy Thursday evening. Sorry. Next week maybe. 

<3 G