In which I hit the enter button a bunch of times to make this post seem longer

Good morning girls and happy Thursday!

I'm so proud that 1/2 of us managed our first week of school and no one missed their posting days. It's a lovely thing. 

What I'm not proud of is the fact that this will probably be the shortest blog post this website has seen.

Why?

Because I spent the whole afternoon at Barnes and Noble looking for books and then not actually buying anything and then when I got home, instead of blogging, I went online and I've been looking at books for an hour.

And now it's time for dinner.

I'm such a winner today.

But I don't feel too bad because we get to see each other on Monday!!

Except for Mercy

She is leaving us for different friends.

Lame.

So yeah, I have to go.

Bye.

PS- because we are seeing each other on Monday, Laura will not be posting.

The end. 

In which, I rant about technology, hand out gold stars, fangirl about the Beatles, Peter Capaldi, and LBJ, in no particular order.

It's hump day!

It's also LBJ's birthday. And as he was president during Beatlemania, I'm currently listening to the melodious voices of Paul McCartney, John Lennon, Ringo Star, and George Harrison. Maybe because I started to listening to the Beatles in a simpler time in my life, when I was about 10, hearing the Beatles just puts me in a good mood. Also on the subject of LBJ, I was reading about him yesterday (which is actually the Beatles song I'm listening to right now) and I found this: "LBJ loved to give gifts. In his first year as President he spent over 3 times as much as his predecessor on gifts. He particularly liked giving electric toothbrushes. "I give these toothbrushes to friends," he explained, "for then I know that from now until the end of their days they will think of me the first thing in the morning and the last at night." His biographer Doris Kearns received more than 12 from Johnson in 10 years." I just love that even 40 years ago, there were people who had the same flawed logic that I have now. Anyway, I'm going to reply to your posts now.

TAB (The Asian Burrtito): It scares me that we're all going to be adults soon. You get s gold star for voicing that fear.

Anyway, someday, I, Rose Backus, who thought Milwaukee was a state for 14 years, will be trusted to make adult decisions. If that does not scare the crap out of you then I don't know what will. 

Lawrencium: I find it impressive that you were able to finish your post 5 minutes before midnight. You get a gold star for effort. 

Also, your lack of gifs was ever so slightly depressing.

CurlyQTip: First of all, your post title was incredibly clever. You get a gold star as well.

Secondly, I'm sorry you're so confused, you get an extra gold star because I feel bad that you're confused.

Alright, lets get down to business. 

So yesterday, I was at a youth group bonfire, which was actually rather fun. I hung out with this weird combination of John's friend, my over dramatic friends, and all the homeschooled boys, and it was weirdly great. Anyway, the not particularly great part of my night came when we were all sitting in the circle, and naturally because it's a group of teenagers, everyone was sitting in a circle snapchatting each other.  They were sitting right next to each other. What have we become? I mean really, we can't even have face to face conversations anymore. Why is it that people can't people just live in a moment? Why do we have to take a picture of everything remotely memorable rather than just living in the memory? I JUST WISH IT WAS THE 1960'S WHEN EVERYONE LISTENED TO QUALITY MUSIC AND THOUGHT TELEVISION WAS DEMONIC AND BELIEVED IN  PEACE ON EARTH AND JUST I HATE THE WORLD! ASDFGHJKL;'

ALSO, CAN WE JUST TALK ABOUT PETER CAPALDI FOR A SECOND? HE IS FANTASTIC! NOT QUITE AS FANTASTIC AS CHRISTOPHER ECCLESTON, BUT THAT'S JUST BECAUSE HIS CATCH PHRASE WAS FANTASTIC.

Or as clever as David Tennant.

Or as adorable as Matt Smith.

But I love him.

He is perfection. And his accent is beautiful.

Anyway, Grace I'm looking forward to your post tomorrow! Thank you and goodnight!

Gurl please -Rose

M'i Desufnoc.

Good morning (evening) gurls, it's Tuesday...

thank god I'm not posting on a Wednesday again

Okay, straight to the song thingy thing. 

The last song you heard

My top favorite song right now. I've got it on spotify, it's magical. Sorry for the (two) swear words. But we're all big gurls here, aren't we? no pun intended. 

And to reply to your posts- 

Laura- I actually haven't read your post yet... because I wanted to get straight to posting so I could go watch The Lego Movie with my family. Sorry. But I'm sure it was lovely, and I'll read it when I'm finish :) 

Rosie- I liked your post except- Grace's birthday and i DONT LIKE THAT SHE'S 17 KJAHLSKJD

Grace- I agree. Everything is weird. And that's also sort of what I'm gonna talk about in my post today...

I'm confused. (in case you were confused, that's what the title of my post is, but backwards. it's a metaphor you see. sort of. i dont even know)

My life has been terribly confusing as of late. Personal things have been weird and school is starting which is weird and my friends are getting boyfriends and becoming busy people and it's CONFUSING and weird and just like so much as been confusing... 

My relationship with Christ has been rocky and bumpy and hard and emotionally exhausting and CoNfUsInG and just AUGH and it's all so confusing and honestly it's all been making me so upset.

But a few days ago I decided to turn things around and someone who hadn't contacted me in over a week finally texted me and explained everything and it made me so happy and I'm starting school tomorrow and I can't wait to see my friends and I'm more committed to spending time with God and I added the choir songs from THP to my Spotify and I'm starting to feel better, slowly but surely.

BUT ANYWAY I HAVE TO GO CUZ MY COMPUTER PAGE IS ABOUT TO LOG ME OUT ROSIE I CANT WAIT TO READ YOUR THING TOMORROW BYE xoxo MErcy

Right down to the wire.

Hello ladies.
    I would just like to say that I just got this laptop of mine in the mail today and the first thing I'm doing on it is writing this post. Forty minutes before midnight. I'm trying to avoid the punishment deadline, and am doing so in true college student fashion.
    Because, I'm a college student now. But we'll get to that in a little bit :)\
    But first, I want to reply to all of your posts from last week!
    Mercy- those Supernatural GIFs were en pointe. Much like your beautiful face. And I agree, Gracie isn't allowed to grow up. She's still the twelve-year-old weird grump with bangs, and shall be, always and forever, at least in my mind.
    Rosie- I know, it's weird I left. You should come visit with Mom tomorrow morning. You can meet my roommate who is your twin (and awesome).
    Graaaaaaace- again, happy birthday! You're becoming such a woman *said in gravelly old aunt voice* but I agree. All this change is freaking me out.
    Which brings me to my segue into my main topic: college.
    I'm writing this at 11:30 at night because my laptop didn't get to my mailbox until today. I named her Adelle, because she's a Dell- get it? I actually picked it up from the mailroom today, but then my roommate and our two friends went to dinner (I AM ABSOLUTELY NOT REPLACING THE FOURSOME BUT IF I WAS I WOULD BE ME AND MY ROOMMATE WOULD BE ROSE AND LIBBY WOULD BE GRACE AND MANDY WOULD BE MERCY) immediately after which I had my anatomy lab (I want to kill myself and I'm only in pre-nursing classes. Good Lord) and then the student events council threw the freshman class a free ice cream social, and we met this kid who is a John Green lookalike while waiting in line, and then we walked Libby back to her dorm, and John Green Kid left us for his theater arts meeting, and here I sit.
    It's been a long day. I don't blame you for no doubt skimming the above paragraph.
    But, seriously gurls, college is great. Today was my fifth day on campus and my first day of classes- I'm not a homeschooler anymore. I'm definitely a college freshman- I keep getting horribly lost on campus, I'm feeling awfully nostalgic and homesick, and my friends and I flock to all the free events where they give away food and t-shirts.
    This is where God wants me. He has prepared me for all of this, and I know now that I had nothing to worry about to begin with. I had no idea I was this social. It's freaky. It freaks my roommate out (because she's a Rose) and people keep thinking I'm an RA or an upperclassmen because I'm so unafraid of introducing myself to complete strangers. How did all of this happen? By the grace of God. Praise Him for putting me where I am right now in this place :)

    ***

    And I only have twenty minutes left so I just want to share a quick story that somewhat sums up my experience at Sacred Heart so far:

    A junior at SHU was walking across the street in Bridgeport on Friday when she got hit by a car. She passed away the next morning. We had a vigil for her in the chapel on Friday night, and I sang in the choir- my first ever choir experience was that unexpected, that sad. But it was amazing to see my fellow students band together, hugging and crying and holding up candles around the quad for a student that most of us barely knew.

    Afterwards, the choir freshmen and I were kind of a mess, so the upperclassmen took us to the music room and sat us down, asking if there was anything they could do to help us process this tragedy that had occurred only the day after most of us moved in. And one of them started playing he piano, a sad, beautiful Ingrid Michaelson song. We learned the song -The Chain- and we sang it together, the acoustics in the music hall accentuating our unified voices, and as we sang the chills ran up my spine, and it made me feel nostalgic, and I thought about a boy. Then, we played more music, and sang and danced, and it was like an episode of Glee.

    That's what my school is. It's a family. It's becoming a home. And I am in love with this place, because even though the girls across the hall have boys over every night, and my backpack has left bruises in my shoulders, I can see why God called me here, of all places. He brought me a little community where I can make a difference for His glory, and I only hope to do so to the best of my ability.

    Sorry for the lack of GIFs and pictures in this post, Rose and Mercy. I still don't know how to use this damn computer.

    Mercy, I'll here from you tomorrow!

    Oh, and probably see y'all on Labor Day. Surpriiiiiise! -Laura :)

   

Everything is just sorta weird

Weird... 

very weird. 

But yes, today is Friday and I am now 17. I guess I was yesterday too but I just started to think about it today. And it is also weird. I've just been feeling weird lately and I don't think it's because Mercy hasn't stopped talking in her Miranda voice, but that might be part of the problem. I'm not really sure, but I guess I should just deal with it.

Anyway! Gurls, yesterday was such a nice day. Like I don't think I was aware of how exceptionally nice, and cool all my friends are. All day, I had endless cards, presents, Facebook messages, snapchats, Instagram posts, texts, phone calls, blog posts (basically any social media site you can think of) coming in and it made me feel so special. I got to spend the day with my beautiful family, making cake, watching Desolation of Smaug, dancing to Mamma Mia and Kpop, and even took an adventure out to the mall and over all it was just a lovely day. And then to top it all off, I got to Facetime with out beautiful college freshman.

Which is another weird thing. Laura is in college. and obviously we've been talking about this for almost a year now, but it's finally here and it's weird. And I don't want to think about it anymore. If I think about Laura, she shall be sitting in a hammock in her back yard, or talking with her mother in their kitchen, or sassing off with Rose and Laura Jay or maybe at youth group. But not on a strange campus with all those band kids and their tubas, or the intimidating jocks, or in the very empty and lonely kitchen.
But I can't ignore it forever. The fact that the Foursome is finally starting to transitioning to functioning adults who have to do scary things like get good educations, or jobs.
But eventually I will face it. And I too will get off my scared young butt and go get a job, or apply to colleges and then Mercy and Rose will follow.
Just give me some more time to process this.

But for now, I need to go back to bed and get more sleep. Or read from the beautiful new Jane Austen books my mother got me yesterday, or listen to some music that will soothe my weird and confused little soul. Sorry that this is short, but I'm not up for anything today except sleep. Maybe I'll just sleep my 17 (technically 18th) year away.
<3 Grace

I haven't had coffee in 2 days, and I got up far to early this morning so this post probably makes me sound like the 9th Doctor on crack.

It's Thorsday I guess...

That feels weird to write. Thanks Mercy. Now I'm disconcerted. Anyway, today is a very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very big day. Not only is it Grace's 17th birthday, it also happens to be the day that Laura moved into school and left us forever. But first, can we just mention that Mercy escaped punishment? I mean, I'm all for having mercy on people (I wish the pun was intended but it was actually an accident), but come on. We have to punish someone sometime. We've had this blog for almost a year and no one has gotten punished. But whatever, I'm going to reply to your posts now.

GRACE! Your post from last Thorsday was fantastically fantastical and you deserve a golden star. I am exceedingly happy to hear that you had a magnificent summer and I hope you can decide what you senior project is swiftly and painlessly and that you inform me of your choice promptly after you do so. Also you're not going into your senior year I will not allow it.

Laura: Your post was good but confusing, like shushi. Also I very much appreciated the Abraham Lincoln gif you used in the end of your suhshi-post.

Shirleydakotamarcymercyege: THAT FREAKING SNAPE DANCING QUEEN GIF WAS TERRIFYING!

This was clearly spawned from some very
creepy fan fiction.

I JUST NOPE NO DEFINITELY NOT. Other than that, you past was great. I completely agree that Grace is not allowed to grow up. In the majestic land of Rosetopia, she shall forever be ingrained in my mind as 13.

Anyway, on to the discussion of this aforementioned big day.

First of all, Grace happy freaking birthday!

 I've known you for my entire life, and I still cannot, nay will not, no, shall not believe that you're 17! I mean, when Harry Potter was 17 he killed the most evil nose-less villian that ever lived! If he can do that, think of all the things you can accomplish. I mean, you can't kill Voldemort because dear Harry already did that, but there's other things you do. You can write a best selling novel or end world hunger or I don't know actually finish War and Peace! All of those things might be shooting a little high but whatever, my point is if Harry Potter can save the world you can to. Okay? Okay. You are a year older and therefore a year better. You're like aged cheese the older you get the better you taste to those weird people that like old gross cheese...that was a really bad analogy so let's just forget that I said that. My point is, you're bursting with potential so you should harvest it like a grape farmer harvests grapes....okay I need to quit the analogy's  because this is not working. Grace, you are amazingly amazing and I am happy to live on a planet that you have graced (no pun intended) with 17 years of life.

Secondly Laura, you are now officially a college student. How does it feel? Thoughts? Questions? Comments? Good good. So after mom came home from dropping you off, she told me that your roommate is exactly like me....take that as you may. It's weird that I told you that over the internet and not in real life. Well, I hope you have an amazing experience in your next 4 years at SHU, and that you learn lots of things and that you don't forget us. I'm praying for you! Good luck!

Well I must bounce. GRACE I'm looking forward to your post tomorrow and happy birthday again!

Gurl please -Rosie

I freaking love Strax.

what just happened

Good morning gurls. it's.... Hump day?

this feels weird... posting on a Wednesday. Like wearing your socks backwards... that's the amount of weirdness I'm feeling right now.

OH ROSE! ROSIE ROSIE ROSIE! Well- Laura and Grace too, but I know Rosie will care most about it-

IT'S MISHA COLLINS BIRTHDAY TODAY!!

How a 40 year-old man can be so cute is beyond me. But he is the cutest.


Anyway. To reply to your posts-

Grace, you forgot to title your post, which bugged me... but other than that I thought it was splendid, but made me want to cry because school is indeed almost here, which I don't like one bit.

Rosie- I WANT TO BE IN CAPE COD RIGHT NOOOOOWWWWW

Laura- I don't even know what happened with your post because.. you posted on Sunday and it got me all confuzzled. But either way it was a perfect post. As all your posts are.


So I liked missed my song challenge thing last week (aka i was too lazy) so I'll just do two today and you don't have to feel inclined to listen to the songs, not that you probably did before, but yanno.

Okay so last weeks was

10- a song by your favorite band

you expect me to choose?

11- a song on the soundtrack of your favorite movie

lets be real

dancing to this at my wedding, btw.


okay okay so GUESS WHO'S BIRTHDAY IT IS TOMORROW?! 

Grace's

she's going to be the

dancing

queen

young

and sweet

only

seventeen


OH MY GOSH I JUST LOOKED UP DANCING QUEEN GIF AND THIS IS WHAT CAME UP

I AM CHOKING

CAN'T. BREATHE

okay MOVING ON

GRACIE IS GROWING UP AND I DON'T LIKE IT BECAUSE SHE IS GOING TO BECOME AN OLD LADY AND BE LIKE DRIVING AND HAVE A JOB AND STUFF AND I JUST WANT TO CRY WHEN I THINK ABOUT IT BECAUSE I DONT WANT HER TO GROW UP AND LEAVE ME AND EVEN IF SHE'S TAKING A GAP YEAR I STILL DON'T LIKE IT AND I MIGHT THROW A HISSY FIT BEFORE SHE LEAVES BUT SHE WONT LEAVE BECAUSE I WONT LET HER

okay my page is going to log me off and I'm upset now so I have to go..


this is why I don't post on Wednesdays...

Rosie...? I guess I'll hear from you tomorrow??

weird.

xoxo
Mercy

Let the good times roll :)

Happy day!
   

    Let's not even pretend like Laura can post on the right days of the week anymore...it's like I've started my college life and I don't move in for four days. What the what. So overrated.
    I shouldn't technically be posting at all, actually. Not on Sunday or Monday or even-

  

    -because tomorrow, we -the Foursome- are reuniting at our dear friend from THP, Jonathan's birthday party. But I wanted to squeeze in one last post before freshman move-in day, because I'm overemotional and busy saying goodbyes and I can't let things go.
    BUT ALL OF YOUR POSTS FROM LAST WEEK WERE FANTASTIC.
    Mercy- that JarPad GIF is back by popular demand. And by popular demand I mean I want to see it. And I'm pretty popular, so:

    Also, I hope you're doing better. If you want to talk about whatever it is that's upsetting you, I'm here for you. I know I'm almost a week late, but my offer still stands.
    Rose- I miss the Cape. I miss wearing my cute new bathing suit and laughing nonstop through Miranda Hart's book and eating donuts from the Chatham Bakery and diving into the ocean at Nauset beach and staying in the freezing water, even though our legs got so cold they felt warm. Let's go back tomorrow.
    Grace- your posts never, ever fail to disappoint. Your brilliance is an incandescent light in which I am delighted to bask. I am so proud of what you did this summer, and what God is going to do for and through you this fall. And I'm listening to that Ben Rector song like you told me to, and it is certainly helping in my current situation.

 ***

   I'm trying to let the good times roll. The Cape was fun, full of family and food and awkward sunburn. I won't have a job this coming semester (I quit), which is actually a Godsend- one less thing to stress about.
    But...tonight I had to say goodbye to Siobhany, who is hopping on a plane to California tomorrow morning to move her brother into Pepperdine. Also tomorrow morning, Miss Megan and I are good-byeing, going on one final haunt at the Trumbull Starbucks before we depart for our first semesters of college later this week. And then, we go to Jonathan's, and that means several more goodbyes, to you gurls and Johnny and a few of our THP people if they come. And there's a boy I'm leaving behind completely, and I feel totally justified in not letting him be a part of this next phase of my life, but sensitive little me is still hurting, stinging with anger and sadness and disappointment, all caused by him and on his behalf.
    And yet...I'm so ready to go. I know not all of these goodbyes are forever. Things will be different- I'll make new friends, learn new things, and who knows? Maybe I'll make a few bad choices. Maybe I'll go to a party or two, fall in love, get my nose pierced. But I'm not afraid. Not scared one single bit. One thing I've learned from taking on the adult world is that I'm stronger than I know. I'm cooperative and passionate, and if I get into what I love I know God will take me places.
    2.6 miles. That's how far Sacred Heart University is from home. one-tenth of a marathon. I could run that, it's less than a 5K- heck, I could go home, use the bathroom, run back- in between a psychology lecture and choir practice.
    But for my inner, isolated homeschooler, 2.6 miles might as well be a thousand. I know I'll cry as soon as my parents leave on move-in day. How do you make friends with people you haven't known for your entire life? How do you tell if a cute boy's intentions are pure? (because one thing I've learned lately, is that I'm not always the best at discerning that). How do you learn in a classroom full of kids who aren't your siblings, from a teacher who isn't your mom?
    Lord willing, I'll learn as I go.
    Gurls, there will be Labor Day. And maybe I'll make it up to Lymans with y'all in October. I'm going back up to Cape Cod with my family for my cousin's wedding reception in just four weeks. There's Columbus Day and Family Weekend and Thanksgiving break. I'm trying to tell myself I'm not leaving at all, but I am, because although I'll bring friends home for weekday dinners and loads of laundry on weekends, I'll change. My normal will change. I'll grow up. I'll stop being so nice, I'll start speaking louder, being more aggressive, maybe even swearing. I'm just praying that God continues to protect me. He has led me to this place, so surely He can lead me through it. Right?

***

   Right. Now, stop over-discussing this. Go to bed and rise and sing My praises in the morning.

***

    Now I lay me down to sleep

I pray the Lord my soul to keep

If I should die before I wake

I pray the Lord my soul to take

***

    Jesus, where would I be without You?

    I'm so thankful for Our Thoughts Are Stars. It's been almost a year- isn't that insane? I thought we would never last this long. Our anniversary is coming up and I cannot wait to celebrate it in true Foursome fashion, with a special post and hilarious text messages and maybe a phonecall. I can't wait to document my school experience here- my trials and triumphs, all the dating and drama, nutty professors and cute Division I athletes and late-night adventures. Oh, and my education too, I guess.

    May God lead me through this bright future He has led me to.

    --Laura :)

***

(I'm waiting til midnight to post this- I have 13 minutes. So technically I did end up posting on my assigned day).

for Rose obviously.

 

Hello gurls,

I've sort of been thinking about school a lot recently. It's almost here and as sad as I am to see summer go, I'm also excited for fall. (and not just because I'm listening to "Fall" by Ed. but that might be part of the reason)
No gurls, I really am ready. I've decided that in the past couple days. My wardrobe has started to shift to jeans, closed toe shoes, and the occasional sweater. Tea is being drunk hot more than iced, and it's almost my birthday. All signs that summer is starting to close.
And people keep saying "this summer has seemed so short!" which it has, but as I think of all the things I've done this summer, I realize that I got in a significant amount of stuff.

• Went on vacation to Florida
• Watched two of my siblings graduate
• Went to the beach multiple times
• Had camp fires
• Eaten my weight in watermelon
• Had many impromptu sleepovers
• Got my drivers permit
• Eaten s'mores
• Re-watched many Harry Potter movies
• Did regular walking 5-7 times a week (until my dog broke her leg....)
• Eaten healthier
• Finished Doctor Who
• Read so many books
• Acquired my very own keyboard piano
• Served in Hartford for an incredible week
• Went on vacation to New Hampshire
• Went canoeing
• Stayed up late and slept in
• and had to say goodbye to Judah as he drove away to college.... I'm still grieving that loss

and so many other things

Gurls, summer is a short time. It's never as long as the books and movies make it out to be but this one was very successful and I highly intend on cramming more things in the rest of this month. More dresses will be worn, more books will be read, and more ice cream cones will be eaten. Because I already am missing the long days of doing nothing, all those visits to Dairy Cream and even the late night hangouts at youth group. I don't know if suddenly I've started to like people more, or the people around me suddenly got a lot cooler, or I'm lying to myself so I think I had a great summer, but I really have enjoyed all those eat and hangouts. ... ... ... I think youth group people read this. It's okay guys. I really do love you 

But, I'm also okay with the fact that school is coming up.

School gives me a sense of achievement everyday when I close the books and know that I gave it everything I have and maybe took in some knowledge (I can hear Mercy groaning). And because I'm going to be a *shudders* senior and will hopefully have some time on my hands (thanks to the fact that I'm not going to be applying to colleges and doing other scary things like that) I really want to help out the other kids with their school (and now I can hear Mercy screaming). I know that last year was a little rough for everyone in different ways and I want that to change.
My mom says that I need a Senior Project this year. Something big that will take me a crap load of time or work and that she can give me a big grade on and I'll have something significant to show her at the end of the year. I'm thinking of giving Lydia weekly piano lessons. But maybe I'll tutor Mercy in math (and now I think she probably died) or Ethan in science. Maybe I'll write a book. Or maybe I'll paint the back side of the garage. Either way, my mind is flowing with ideas and hopes for this coming year. And believe me, this is probably going to end by the Tuesday of our first week of school. But who cares?
And I know that we all have hopes and fears for this coming school year. We have to let the summer end and welcome in something new. We have goodbyes and hellos to say. Let go of familiar faces and feelings and welcome in a whole ton of new. Maybe that's a new school, new classes, new responsibilities, or even just trying to get back into a swing of things after a good couple months of nothing. But whatever each of us is facing, lets face it with open arms and wide smiles. We can't stop it from coming. Last time I checked, none of us are Time Lords. So why try and keep it from coming. It's going to be scary and a helluva ride but it's going to be great. I just know these things.
And lets make a pact to not stop this blog. I know we've said it before but things are going to change soon. Mercy and Laura only have a week or two before they start their classes and Rose and I will start again probably soon after that. But let's try and figure things out so that our little third space on the internet doesn't have to stop. Even if that means switching up posting orders for a certain college freshman, or giving a little leeway for late posts due to class trips, SATs, or tons of crap called homework. Or taking weeks off when we get to midterms or finals or graduations.

This is all still weird to type out because it still is summer and there is still time left to squish things in so I'm just going to stop and REPLY TO YOUR POSTS! yay.
except all I have to say is that Rose, your post sounds like you're taking drugs. just throwing that out there because it's what everyone was thinking.

and Mercy, please be happy. and come rant to me if you need it. which I know you probably do. Because I'm pretty sure I know what you were talking about.

and be happy. also be proud of me for including this. i just know all the right ways to cheer you up and this is one of them :) you're welcome 

And Laura, you got this whole college thing. I know you do. I can see why you're so freaky and emotional and everything... but I think that the other 3/4ths of us can see how tremendously you're going to do.
this song is for

But I have to go read Emma and soak in the beautiful weather that is hinting at the season to come. I need to play with my dog, call Subway, take a walk with Ethan and do so many other things that need to happen. I hope you Backus girls are having the most beautiful time in Cape Cod and I sincerely hope that I will get to see you soon. Like 3 or 4 days soon.
<3 Grace

I have to finish this post so I can go to a magical place.

It's hump day?

I guess, it's summer so I can't remember what day it is. I can barely even remember what month it is. Anyway, I am currently writing this post while watching Mean Girls from Cape Cod. As you have probably already guessed, this post is going to be about Cape Cod, but I'm going to reply to your posts first.

Laura: I just want to say no matter how excited I am to be one step closer to having my own room, I will still miss you an awful lot when you're at school. Probably.

Mercy: Honey, you need to pour yourself a big glass of chocolate milk, put on some sweats and watch some Doctor Who. Okay? Okay.

Now onto what I was going to post about.

I awoke this morning after having a dream that I was in Cape Cod. Then in my dream, I realized that I actually in Cape Cod, so I woke myself up. I got dressed, well I put on sweats and a t-shirt, drank some coffee with Annie and Dad, walked around the yard of the house we're staying in, and then Dad, Annie, Ben, and I went to the beach, because it was supposed to rain this afternoon. We went to this cute little beach in Chatham, where we're staying, and walked along the shore picking up shells. Then we came home, ate lunch, and I watched Mean Girls with Laura and John, and now here I am writing a blog post in the basement of my dear aunts house, while rain gently falls from the sky. I love this place. I've always loved this place ever since the first time I came here when I was 6 years old. I love going to the beach every day. I love how everybody gets along when we're here. I love how quiet the house we stay in is. I love reading for hours and hours without being interrupted. I love getting doughnuts from the Chatham bakery. I just love this place.

Well, I'm going to go read my slightly stupid,, yet intriguing  Young Adult fiction book.

Grace, I'm looking forward to your post tomorrow!

Gurl please! -Rose

Wait, I should probably add more gifs or y'all will yell at me.

I love him so much oh my goodness.

Oh Jaquan!

Okay bye for real this time!

I'm not doing my song challenge today because I'm lazy.

good evening gurls, it's Tuesday.

I'm in a bit of a foul mood, because I'm mad at.. people.  just some people. or a person. whatever.

me most of the time

BUT! I AM NOT HERE TO BE SAD OR DEPRESSED OR UPSET!! I am here to blog, and talk to my gurls, and I don't want to be sad anymore, so I'm not going to be.


although the Coldplay music isn't helping... but sort of. because I really, really love Coldplay a lot.


ANYwaaayy yeah I've been making myself unhappy recently and it's really starting to bug me, actually... I need to stop it already.

Laura- your post yesterday made me sad because I'm going to miss you a whole freaking lot when you're gone.... you're gonna get busy and become an important college student and have like, a life, and other friends and you're gonna meet *gasps* boys and maybe become *gasps louder* FRIENDS WITH THEM! *covers mouth in surprise.*
Just make sure you ain't showin' them no ankles! Because, you know what they'll become! *whispers* skankles.

p.s- you forgot something...

WHY IS HE SO FREAKING CUTE UAAHAHGHAHGUAKJSH anyway moving on.


okay
So, it's weird. School is almost here. I mean, literally.
I start school in 15 days. 15 DAYS. DO YOU EVEN UNDERSTAND I JUSTKL ASJDH

I'm actually really excited for Academy to start again because I LOVE IT SO MUCH and yeah but.. I mean, my school is wonderful, but it's high school.

And yeah, as a semi-sheltered homeschooled kid, I don't exactly "fit it" which I find to be ridiculous because I am so cool (*laughs*) but you know how it is.. you have to like, know stuff and be able to do the cool dances and know all the cool words to be consider cool, or something like that..

but since I can't twerk, I don't have a bae, and I don't say 'slaaaayyy' or 'yaaaaaaaaaaaassss' with every sentence, apparently I'm not cool.

I mean, yeah, I have my A W E S O M E  friends who are absolutely super mega foxy awesome hawt, and they don't really care that I'm homeschooled, which is awesome- but still..

my feelings exactly Miley.

Being cool is overrated. That's what I've decided anyway.


OKAY listen to this song before I go, because it's beautiful

Thanks Jonathan, btw, for the recommendation :) {B.o.B is pretty boss tbh}

he is literally such a dork.

Anyway, I love y'all so so much. Rosie, I don't know if you're posting tomorrow because you're in the wonderful land of Cape Cod, but if you do... I can't wait to read it!

xoxo
Mercy


p.s- GRACE AND ABBIE AND I ARE WATCHING THE 50th DOCTOR WHO EPISODE TONIGHT AND I AM SO FREAKIN EXCITED!!

accurately describes my feelings 

I can('t) do this, gurls.

good morning gurls, it's actually Saturday.

this picture speaks to my Anne Shirley soul :)

    I'm writing this early because I'll be working four shifts at work over the next three days, and right now, on this sunny Saturday morning, is the only time I'll really have to post before Monday. So here I am, future readers.

to go along with the apparent coffee/tea theme of this post

    Now is the portion of my post in which I would reply to Gracie, Mercy, and Rose's posts from last week...except none of us posted last week, since the Ege clan were in New Hampshire- not Cape Cod as I assumed (but you know what they say about assuming *winkwinkROSEwinkwink*).
    Next week it's the Backus family's turn at vacation, and we are actually going to the Cape. I should really say, "THEY are actually going to the Cape," because I am probably not leaving with them on Tuesday evening, and my heart is breaking. My ambiguous work schedule, lack of shopping I have accomplished for The Big C, and desire to squeeze in as many visits with my friends as I possibly can before I move out, are all preventing me from attending my last family vacation before college. Hence the heartbreak. HOWEVER, my amazing auntie -who is getting her master's degree in nursing at SHU and bought me my school hoodie when I committed and was generous enough to purchase my most expensive textbook when I got my course list- will be driving through Connecticut to the Cape on Friday- she owns the house we stay at every year. She offered to pick up I and Mary-Kate -also not going, also because of work: when did she become a nurse with a career?- and take us up for the weekend, so there's a good chance I'll be able to get in some family vacation time before everything I have ever known changes into what I have been dreaming of for ever so long.
    So, Cape Cod? Possibly.
    Jonathan's birthday party? Definitely maybe.
    Packing for school? I can't do it.
    I am literally incapable of packing. I still have to buy a backpack, a computer, and most of my textbooks, along with food, shower stuff, and a rug that my roommate approves of (Merton Hall has tile floors- ew). The list goes on, as well as my impatience. I like to have everything settled, but as of right now I have some notebooks and a box of granola bars packed in a chest of plastic drawers that will accompany me to Merton in just twelve days. I think I'm going to need a bit more to survive freshman year.
    I am also emotionally incapable of packing, without crying. Thursday night as I cleaned my room it actually hit me: only two weeks. Two weeks from right now I'll be moved in. Two weeks from right now I'll probably be at a choir rehearsal. Two weeks from right now I won't have Rosie's snoring to lull me to sleep. Two weeks from right now I'll be sharing a dorm room with someone who is almost a complete stranger.
    It hurt, an aching pain that feels almost like the one that typically accompanies my anxiety, not as icy as wintertime depression, but damn near close. But I also felt joy, this overwhelming excitement that can only come from God and knowing that although I may not feel like it, He has prepared me to start my next big adventure.
   And so the tears fell, and I welcomed their presence as they trailed down my cheeks and clung to my eyelashes. I realized that I wanted to feel this way. I invited these emotions to run their course through my tired young body, because feeling things in big, oceanic waves is the only way I am capable of moving forward in this briefly ironic journey known as life.
    I stood with my shaking palms braced against my dresser, my eyes directed at the scuffed wooden floor of my childhood bedroom, praising God for how He has made me feel. I used to never acknowledge I had emotions, but here I was as I am now, facing my feelings because I have learned (the hard way) that it's unhealthy to conceal. It's a lie, to myself, my friends, and God, when I say "I'm fine" while my heart is breaking. I'm learning, gurls. Learning and healing and it's all because of God. It's always all because of God.
    So I contacted my amazing friends, the ones I'm usually there for, and I was overjoyed when they were overwhelmingly there for me, comforting me and making me laugh through my tears:

    "This next season is gonna be so full of new/exciting things and soon you'll get so caught up in it you'll forget how sad it was in the transition" -Miss Megan

    "It's like the next chapter of a book. You're sad that the last chapter is over but you're excited to see what the next chapter will bring. Don't be afraid to open the next chapter...okay?" -Siobhany

    "I know that as scary and unfamiliar as it all seems now, you are going to have so many amazing experiences and meet so many cool people and have so many stories to tell. And yeah there's gonna be hard times. Times when all you want to do is go home. Times when you feel like you have no friends but the good times are gonna be so much better. And you're about 10 minutes from home so you can always go back on the weekends and such. And you can ALWAYS text me...it's gonna be great. Just wait:)" -Gracie

    I can do this, gurls. I just can't do this alone. And definitely not without some feels.

 ***

    This post was somewhat of a shout in the void, what really should have been a journal entry. But I woke up this morning and felt led to write this. And I read Gracie's latest blog post and felt even more inspired to write this. So I did. And I regret nothing.

    Mercy, I can't wait to read what you have to say on Tuesday.

    --Love from the Laura <33