oy with the poodles already

good evening gurls, it's wednesday.

Grace is super grumpy so i have to write this quickly since i'm using her laptop... (lol)

sorry for not posting last week, i just had a really bad and very long day and didn't even remember that i had to post until 11:30 at night...... these things DO happen.


I got into Much Ado! I'm just a watchman, and I have a number instead of a name, but I don't really care cuz I love my cast and my director and I'm just happy to be in a show at all...


I'm in a weird emotional state right now... I'm so happy because it's fall and I love fall, and youth group has started again and we're back to our original d-groups and I'm happy to be back with my little church family.....

but at the same time... I don't know. I'm not really finding a lot of happiness in my life right now? school is my worst enemy and i don't feel like i belong in my school anymore. its ridiculous to say this, but the only thing that makes me happy on a daily basis is listening to one direction on the bus. my boys can never fail to cheer me up. (pre-order made in the a.m on itunes, out nov. 13th)


i always get into this depressed slump around autumn, which is funny because autumn in my favorite season... but being depressed around Christmas is the worst, so hopefully i'll be better by then.


also, my impending singleness doesn't help. literally, 99.9% of my friends have a boyfriend or a guy who is interested in them... like.... how???? did?? i??? miss?? this???? i mean i know i'm annoying but really.

Rosie, I guess it's just you and I now. i mean, we ARE married, so I guess i'm not single forever.

no but for real? how am i still single?

i mean honestly i know i'm too young for a boyfriend but that doesn't change the fact that I really want one. whatever.

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I hate being sad because i feel like i can't talk to anyone about it because i don't want to look like im asking for pity or sympathy. I hate being that girl. i want to be strong, you know?

i also realized how easily influenced i am. how scared i am of judgement. i didnt order a pumpkin spice latte the other day at starbucks because i didnt want the barista to think i was basic. i always walk the long way around the high school just so i dont have to walk past the kids who eat lunch outside because i dont want them to look at me.

i dont know. i need one direction's new album to come out already, they're my therapy music and i need more asap.

it's gilmore girls season and i havent watched that much gilmore girls yet, i think that's why im so sad.

me at school

babe and a half

anyway this has taken me far too long, i really need to go. sorry for always being a mope. i don't know what else to write about.

Rosie, I'll hear from you tomorrow??

xoxo,
Mercy